Instead of spending all days long endlessly scrolling your Facebook feed due to the coronavirus outbreak, you can read a book that affects your love life immediately.
It is not often I can find a new book that gives a new approach for females seeking love. However, I found it in His Secret Obsession by James Bauer.
The book claims that it can help women improve their love lives.
But does this book actually live up to the hype?
To have the answer, I decided to purchase the book and wrote a review with my most honest thoughts. You can read my review to figure out whether it will work for you.
My review includes affiliate links, which means that I earn a commission if you end up purchasing His Secret Obsession. Nevertheless, it can’t stop me from sharing the truth of it.
What is His Secret Obsession?
His Secret Obsession written by James Bauer is a powerful relationship instruction that you can download PDF or audiobook versions.
The book gives solutions to many problems that impact women all over the world, including:
- Why men can lose interest in a woman after the initial attraction wears off
- Why men are reluctant to commit long term, even when the early signs of relationship seem so promising
- Why men can pull away suddenly and stop communicating with their partners.
His Secret Obsession focuses on the fact that men are controlled by instinctive needs, even if they are not consciously aware of them.
It is called ‘The Hero Instinct’ by James Bauer. And he says that it’s relied on women to bring this to the fore. In fact, he found that a man would be attracted to any woman who makes him feel it.
According to ‘The Hero Instinct’, males are controlled by these three things:
- To live a meaningful life and feel appreciated for his efforts
- To provide for those he cares about in life, including his family, friends and especially his romantic partner
- To be respected by his peers.
In conclusion, men want to be a hero. And more crucially, they want to be your hero.
Who is James Bauer?
James Bauer is a famous writer and I read another one of his earlier books a year ago, What Men Secretly Want.
He started working as a trained psychologist. Studying the intricacies of men and women’s brains and how they are different, Bauer became a relationship coach. He has worked with thousands of males and females to help them make their relationships stronger for more than 12 years.
He studied their situations carefully and found what he believes is the secret to developing a long-term, satisfying relationship. His method is depended on his own experience as a therapist and basic human psychology.
He has put all of this knowledge into His Secret Obsession.
Even though I’m very familiar with James Bauer, I could not find anything valuable but a lot of hype.
Therefore, the only thing I could do is to buy it, read it, and give my verdict on it here.
‘The Hero Instinct’: What do I think about it?
The Hero Instinct is certainly fascinating that makes men romantic.
For both men and women, one of the most important things is to live a meaningful life and devote their lives to the things and people they love and care about. You can find more information in my eBook of responsibility for your life.
However, I’m interested in the way James Bauer made the step further and applied it specifically to the way males approach dating and relationships.
Bauer believes that men are actually pretty simplistic.
The only thing men want is to be like heroes. James argues that it is related to our primal nature.
After thinking carefully about it for a long time, I find that it is a lot of truth. Because a man’s psyche depends on his ego, in this guide, Bauer teaches women how to appeal to that ego.
I also see myself in his descriptions of men and what we need.
The motivation of meaning, respect and support the people we care for are common to all males, including me.
How you can awaken the hero
His Secret Obsession has its merit that men want to feel like heroes.
Nevertheless, the greatest thing in the book that other dating guides don’t have is that it describes step-by-step how to do it. This instruction is simple, actionable for you to awaken the hero in any man.
In the first section of the book, you can get enough information about the hero instinct in men; and in the second one, there are some techniques you can apply in your own relationship.
I won’t mention the content of the tips and strategies due to the fair of the author. All I can tell you is that they are practical and easy to action.
They will help you to:
- Get the guy you want to commit to you
- Gain his love and devotion over the long term
- If you’ve been through a break-up, rekindle his interest in you and get him to chase you again.
As a matter of fact: The book isn’t about stupid mind games. There’s no manipulation involved. And you can be yourself.
Instead, this book shows what your man needs and you let him step up to the plate and fulfill them. By following the methods, you can make him feel fulfill of meaning, respect, and being a provider.
Your man may feel better about himself and he will consider you in a whole new light, which will make your relationship with him better.
One more interesting in the book is Rachel.
You’ll be introduced to her as you first begin reading His Secret Obsession.
She is struggling in her relationship is one of James Bauer’s favorite clients. Not want to be clingy, she hung back, but her man didn’t contact her.
As a result, Rachel went to her relationship coach – James Bauer.
He provides her with a 12-word method to text her boyfriend. Soon after that, he came back to her.
Whereas Jame was pleased, he didn’t feel happy because he wanted to help more people. So, he wrote His Secret Obsession.
In the last part of the book, James Bauer shows the exact 12-word formula that stimulated the hero instinct in boyfriends.
His Secret Obsession Review: My experience
As a man, I’m not James Bauer’s intended audience. So, I think I can give such an objective review.
Just only a short paragraph, I began to resonate with the main theme: That men have a hero instinct to be the protector.
Although due to the development of human-being in 2020, it probably seems that we’ve gone past the whole “primal instinct” thing
On the contrary, we really haven’t. Men are still men. And we’re still controlled by the same instincts we’ve always had.
We still want women to desire us. We still want women to need us.
The book with just 200 pages has plenty of illustrations that make me keep engaged but not get lost.
His Secret Obsession including new ideas, tips and strategies is the best dating book I have read. Because everything in the book is based on men’s psychology and practical examples.
James Bauer doesn’t pretend to be a dating “guru”. He simply tells simple truths depended on men’s psychology and his own experience working with women and men over the last 12 years.
Why I’m reviewing a dating guide for women
Reading all kinds of dating books is my hobby, even those not specifically written for males, because I can understand human psychology better.
I have to provides my readers with as many unique perspectives as I can. Personally, this is because I know how important a healthy relationship is for everyone. The more I know well about the psychology of attraction, the better my own love life will be.
So, my interest is always triggered since a new dating book like His Secret Obsession publics and gets a lot of attention.
The Pros of His Secret Obsession
- This is the only dating book you’ll need (With over 200 pages, bonus materials, and a workbook)
- The advice is practical
- His methods are research-based
- It’s easy to download
- There’s a money-back guarantee (With a 60-day money-back guarantee)
The cons of His Secret Obsession
- It’s only on eBook/audio
- His style can be a bit condescending
- The price ($47)
My verdict: Is His Secret Obsession worth it?
Well, after reading the book and writing my His Secret Obsession review, do I think it’s worth it?
There are two things I find since I recommend a new book.
- I want it to be thought-provoking and to learn new things
- I want it to be VERY practical. There is little point in gaining a new perspective on something if you can’t apply it to everyday life.
James Bauer meets both fronts.
So in my opinion, it’s well worth the price. $47 isn’t pocket change, but I haven’t come across a dating book as comprehensive or insightful as this one.
His Secret Obsession has the wisdom of a relationship expert with 12 years of experience in this subject, as well as tips and strategies based on concrete human psychology.
I’m a man but I learned a lot from it, so I can imagine how helpful it will be for females.
His Secret Obsession may become your secret weapon in case you’re struggling to get a man to commit or want a better relationship.